Who is your friend?

‘Life is partly what we make it and partly what it is made by the friends we choose ‘Tennessee Williams (American Playwright 1911-1983)

Life is a beautiful journey.The way we walk it today will determine our destination tomorrow. Through my 20 something years on this road, I have come to know that right relationships are very essential. People can be the angels that lift us up and serve as destiny helpers. They can also be the ones to bring us so low that there is no more self-worth left in us.
Good friends will take on your hands when you think you are incapable. They will stand by and with you through thick and thin. They won’t only tell you the things you love and want to hear but those genuine things that sink deep into the crevices of your mind and causes you to retrace your steps. They will build you up with both hands through the counsel they give.

Bad friends on the other hand will help lead you into a path of self-destruction. They will seemingly build you with one hand and destroy you with the other. They will influence your wrong thoughts, which may lead to wrong decisions and actions. These will in turn lead to bad habits. In addition, those habits will help frame your character. Mind you, your character is your destiny, whether good or bad. My mum will always say ”a bad friend is like a rodent who in your sleep, bites and gently blows you at the same time. It’s only when you wake from your slumber that you feel the pain of their bite.”

The good news in all this is that, you and I have the power to choose whom we allow full access. We can qualify who reaches where. We also have the sole power to place boundaries to avoid any sort of violation. The kind of relationships you build upon will have a strong effect on your attitudes and will greatly influence the course of your destiny.
One of my brother in ministry, Onyi Anyado of B1 coaching services would say, “Who are the people you speak to regularly and what are they saying to you? If U surround yourself with Wise, Strong, Motivated and Passionate people guess what rubs on you?

Determining whose words you lend a listening ear to is important if you want to succeed greatly .A good tree will produce good fruit, and a bad tree will produce bad fruit. A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit.So every tree that does not produce good fruit should be chopped down and thrown into the fire.Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you are able to identify people by their actions and make a choice on whom to befriend.(Read Mat 7:15-20)

In the book of 1 Kings in the bible, there is the story of Rehoboam, the son of King Solomon, one of the wisest men to have ever lived. His father died and as God had promised, he (Rehoboam) inherited the kingdom of Israel.
His father Solomon was the strict kind of person who made laws that were so tough that some of his adversaries had to flee. It was only after his demise that some of his adversaries’ offspring began to return;one of such was Jeroboam. He returned from Egypt whence he had fled to and together with the leaders of Israel went to speak to King Rehoboam. They wanted him to lighten the harsh labour demands and heavy taxes that his father had imposed upon the people. If he yielded to to their request, they were ready to become his loyal subjects.

Rehoboam knew how essential relationship was so he asked for three days to think it over. In that time, he went to the ‘older counsellors’ to seek advice on the matter. This is what they said to him, “If you will be a servant to this people today and serve them, and speak good words to them when you answer them, then they will be your servants forever. (1 Kings 12:7 ESV).
Because this was not pleasing to his ear, he rejected their counsel. He instead decided to seek the opinion of the young men who had grown up with him and were now his advisers.’ ” What is your advice?” he asked them. “How should I answer these people who want me to lighten the burdens imposed by my father?” The young men replied, “This is what you should tell those complainers who want a lighter burden: ‘My little finger is thicker than my father’s waist! Yes, my father laid heavy burdens on you, but I’m going to make them even heavier! My father beat you with whips, but I will beat you with scorpions!’”(1 Kings 12:8-10 NLT).This seemed in his favour so he decided to base his response to the people on his friends’ advice. His reply was unwelcomed by the leaders of Israel .This led to chaos and disorder in the kingdom because the tribes of Israel eventually refused to accept him as king or submit to him as subjects. This,unfortunately caused him to lose part of the kingdom of Israel and to flee from his own.

I used this story as an illustration because it shows that as much as we have a mind of our own, hearsay can greatly influence our decisions. This story also portrays just how much people can either build or destroy your destiny. Friends can break or make you!

As we have begun the second half of the year, have a re-check of your relationships. Who is adding and who is subtracting to and from your life? Who is draining you? Who is walking you down the path to success? Make a choice today to keep good company lest you end up a fugitive like Rehoboam.Qualify the access.

” Just as lotions and fragrance give sensual delight, a sweet friendship refreshes the soul. ”Proverbs 27:9(MSG)

© July 2010 Aminata.A R .Dibassey

Letter from God 2 (I will always carry you through!)

Hello My child,
Looking back at yesterday, you know you are not where you were.You’ve moved on and made effective progress regardless of how seemingly little it appears to you. I’ve brought you through and out of misery and pain. I’ve mercifully delivered you from the harsh consequences you deserved. I paved a way of escape when your path seemed dim and you had no idea where the next curve was leading.I stood by you as a shepherd, a guide; directed your path and caused you to suffer no lack.I put up with your mess when everyone else wouldn’t stand you but walk away.I guarantee a blessing on everything concerning you!

When everyone disdained you,I was there and boosted your self-esteem.When your back was against the wall, guess what, I was still there as your backbone.I didn’t look at your sin and closed my heart:no,all because I am just too loving and compassionate,slow to anger and abounding in so much love.
Your enemies, I caused to flee in 7 ways and their enchantments and divinations,I didn’t let it work against you.I promised I’ll never leave you nor forsake you and I’m not about going back on my word!

I specialize in repeat performances.I made it happen before;nothing can and would stand in my way now.I am able to do beyond your wildest imagination;you can’t just comprehend my ability as much as you try.I caused you to remain alive through it all before.You haven’t died,you’re still here!

Today doesn’t change the fact that I’ll still keep you. I empower you to remain above only and not under the circumstances.My grace is still available to enable you emerge a conqueror.I make it abound to you,so that always having all-sufficiency in everything;you may have abundance for every good deed. Just walk into the grace!

When last did you just take a little time to talk with me like a child would His father? My ears are wide opened you know,ever-ready to listen to what you have to utter and to take your request into consideration.I am your Father and surely my arm is not too short to save,nor my ear too dull to hear.I can move mountains;yes,I’m mighty to save.

As simple as my letter to you is,I mean every word I say and when I speak,who can reverse?Quit playing the ‘looking good outside when the inside speaks a different story’.Throw away the fake smile and allow me restore you.Stop looking for help with men;I am your help and only source,all the way! It does not cost me because you are the precious apple of my eye.

Look up to me and you won’t be dissapointed.Hope in me and you won’t be ashamed. Come unto me with your burdens,weariness,brokenness and I will give you rest.Be still and know I am God.I am with you,your refuge!
I’m here extending my loving arms to embrace and help you.I want to love you,care for you and be there for you at all times.I will always carry you through!Would you come to me?

I am God Your father and I love you!

© June 2010 Aminata.A R .Dibassey

PS:Is 59:1, Ps 23,46:10,103, Deut 28:7, 2 Cor 9:8, Mat 11:28

Don’t let sin keep you out of greatness!!!

\’In the words of Satan\’ The Arrows

‘There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins. Ecclesiastes 7:20’ (I don’t know who I’m reminding this to,but I am convinced it’s for one person out there).

King David, the Lord’s anointed,was a man after God’s heart. But guess what, like you and I would, he fell from grace.He coveted,committed adultery with Bathsheba and got her pregnant.To cover up for the shameful act, he needed to shift the responsibility to someone else.So he sent for Uriah, Bathsheba’s husband to return and ” go down to his house, and wash his feet” whilst there was an ongoing war. He (David) even tried to get him (Uriah) drunk just so he could go home, but Uriah was adamant not to return whilst his fellows were staying and camping in temporary shelters and in the open field.

I’m sure David believed per chance, Uriah would lie with his wife which will then make him believe the baby was his and bang, incident covered! He (David) allowed lust get its nasty little hooks into his heart. Since his plan failed, he became desperate and like we all will in moments of desperation,acted stupidly.He sent Uriah to an early grave.His selfish intention was to hide his sin so even the news of Uriah’s death did not tickle him. (2 Samuel 11).

There are other instances where David fell from grace (You can have a look in your spare time ,2 Samuel 24).He took pride in statistics instead of trusting on God’s strength.

David had blood in his hands,he erred. Here is a great example of a man who sinned but refused to stay there.God rebuked him and he consciously decided to partake of the beauty of God’s divine grace and mercy.He was honest with God and repented,accepted God’s forgiveness; forgave himself and moved on! (1 Samuel 12:1-13, Psalm 51).

What’s that sin holding you back? What is it you’re hiding and for how long?You’re feeling dirty,guilty and ashamed; so much that you can’t stand before God in prayer because sin has separated you from Him. Due to this, you stay away for a while hoping you’ll feel bold enough to go before God again. It doesn’t have to work that way. You can’t hide your heart from God no matter how hard you try. He already knows what you did and what you will do. Everything is laid bare before him.

I’ve messed up real bad, many times and I believe you have. Sometimes I look back and I wonder if that was really me!Beating ourselves down, having a ‘pity party’ and feeling sorry doesn’t just do it! It doesn’t change a thing! At every occasion, we’ve got to stand again like David did.Obviously no one is going to, for us. The more we stay on the ground, the happier the enemy becomes.He loves the guilt and condemnation game because our mind is his favourable spot.He’s convinced that if he can keep you in the guilt, then he’s got the whole you and can do as he pleases.

You don’t have to stay in the clutter of sin and mess because there’s so much greatness in and ahead of you! We do not have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help. (Heb 4:15).He’s so gentle, slow to anger and abounding with so much love. As far as the east is from the west, He removes our transgressions (Ps 103:12).Isn’t that good news? Why stay battered and on that spot when you have so much love and mercy waiting to embrace you?

Get up, don’t you just sit there!Pick yourself up,be honest with God about what you’ve done and confess your sins. He’s faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.Get out of the mess whilst you are, don’t wait another day! Don’t let sin keep you out of fulfilling purpose. And as you come out of that mess,ask for the Grace not to falter in it over again.The enemy would sure whisper that you’re weak and you can’t handle it but,keep your ears shut and don’t use that as an excuse.He’s the father of lies,has always been and will forever remain.His only aim is to steal, kill and destroy your destiny! (John 10:10).He loves to keep us bound.But we have to stand and boldly proclaim: ‘No, devil, you ain’t having me; Jesus paid for my sins, and therefore I can go boldly to the throne grace to obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. And besides there’s no condemnation because I am in Christ. God said it,that settles it!!! (Heb 4:16, Rom 8:1).

PS: I don’t know who I’m talking to today.In case you’re struggling and lying in the pool of a past mistake or living and allowing the shame of what you did hinder you from fulfilling your calling,I encourage you to take up your bed and rise up.Jesus can make you whole;He did me,that’s why I can write and share this with you!If I don’t live it, there’s no way I’d be telling it.God’s son is offering you love, peace, rest, forgiveness, and hope for eternity, will you embrace Him now?


© June 2010 Aminata.A R .Dibassey

Wisdom is the principal thing!!!

Every now and then, we are plunged in certain struggles and regrets reason being that we did not know better and did not have the wisdom necessary. Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom and with all thy getting get understanding. Exalt her, and she shall promote thee: she shall bring thee to honour, when thou dost embrace her. (Prov 4:7 KJV)

I’m currently reading a book co-written by Michelle McKinney Hammond, an American bestselling author/speaker and Joel Brooks Jnr, a Pastor as well as an author. A statement in the chapter where I am at now caught me off-guard. I quote: ‘Wrong beliefs (which I personally consider as ignorance) lead to inaccurate conclusions, which are the basis for wrong decisions, ultimately sending us in the wrong direction.’ Hmm, powerful revelation, isn’t it?

This powerful statement got me into a serious thinking mode. Many times we  have indulged ourselves  in stuff  we should not have /committed silly mistakes, all due to ignorance, but which is in no way an excuse. And when we reminisce, we may be like, Woa, “if only I knew better then I would have done and acted better.” Ever since I have come to know its importance, I  can say that wisdom is an ‘organized life’; so we ought to seek it with all might as  it saves from wrong decisions, destruction and doom.

If you know better, you sure will do better, that’s just the key. You see, Wisdom is profitable to direct (Eccl 10:10). Knowledge and Understanding is power that must be greatly sought after! (Prov 4:7).The revelation of a matter opens you up to a whole new realm and causes you to walk in a right and just path.It is the glory of God to conceal a thing: but the honour of kings is to search out a matter.

A Pastor friend of mine once told me:’You are a victim to what you are ignorant to.Your liberty is in line with your knowledge.2 Peter 2:19,tells us ,’For you are a slave to whatever controls you’.

What you don’t know will surely destroy you and may leave such a devastating effect in your life for years.It is imperative to seek wisdom and make it your closest friend.If any of you lacks wisdom,let him ask God,that giveth all men liberally,and upbraideth not;and it shall be given him.(James 1:15 KJV).If you don’t know what you are doing,pray to the Father.He loves to help.You’ll  get his help,and won’t be condescended to when you ask for it.Ask boldly,believingly,without a second thought,(James 1:5 The Message)

You and I  ought to hunger for wisdom like never before because we live in a generation where all that is required to cause us to walk in excellent wisdom is readily available. If you ask, God will not withhold any good thing from you. Solomon asked and he received very great insight and a breadth of understanding as measureless as the sand on the seashore. (1 Kings 4:29).

Doc Childre and Deborah Rozman quoted, “It is no longer enough to be smart — all the technological tools in the world add meaning and value only if they enhance our core values, the deepest part of our heart. Acquiring knowledge is no guarantee of practical, useful application. Wisdom implies a mature integration of appropriate knowledge, a seasoned ability to filter the inessential from the essential.”

Are you seeking wisdom? Is the pursuit knowledge a priority? What are you doing to save yourself and your generation from the victimization ignorance entangles us in?

Seek God, study the word(the book of Proverbs is full of insight and a good start to wisdom if you’ve never studied the word).Buy and read books, listen to other people’s works,research, watch and seek whatever will add to your wisdom; GO FOR IT,DON’T DELAY!

Kill your lion of ignorance today and enjoy the honey wisdom brings!


© June 2010 Aminata .A .Dibassey

(Please kindly quote sources to avoid copyright infringements. These and other works shared are geared towards a project. Please be kind!)

You don’t belong in the mud!!!

God, why is there so much clutter in my life ?Why do I persist in doing what I ought not when I know perfectly well that  the end result is but shame and disappointment? Why do things I put my hands to tend to end  in dissaray?Why the loneliness: can’t I just have that one person I so want and desire? Could I be happy just for once? Anyone recall having heard or even spoken such?

Life is intriguing and it happens to us all. Some circumstances and people  can be disturbingly provocative leading us to an easy  fall. We slip and  tumble no matter the pretence.Rocks are thrown at us from every corner; we swim in the dirtiest of dirt; we earnestly long for things we cannot get. We struggle to keep people or stuff we should  allow be and that in turn exposes us to hurt especially when the response or outcome is not in our favour. We experience stuff that drain our confidence .We repeatedly make those mistakes and consistently commit those ‘silly’ acts ‘ in good faith’, being certain that something  different will eventually occur.

That is the mud life can toss us into but ,we don’t always have to settle in that struggle. Life has a span and no one really knows when our end is. What better way is there to live life than being thankful for the seemingly ‘little nothings’ someone else is crying for and just be joyful with what we have?

I have come to know that being not just content but joyful is a conscious decision. So is being sad and discontented .I’ve had experiences which have left me rather disappointed; Circumstances where I  hoped for some good to come about  but didn’t. In such instances, the ‘normal thing’ is to be sad and cry my heart out; but you know what, I allow myself  feel bad for a while and there and then, I ask God to forgive me, help me overcome my emotions and above all my thoughts rather than have them overrule me .I refuse to let the temporary  happenstances  affect me. I choose to look at the brighter side of life and tell myself, ‘Use this to glorify God and bless another life’. One  thing always occurs to me, ‘If I can’t  think it, then it can’t ’t hurt me,simple.As I think  so am I and as I am so will my do be.’(Prov 23:7)

I have no slight idea where you find yourself now, I don’t know where you’ve been hurt. I’m not aware of the happenings in your world but what I do know is that you can be joyful,yes,you can! A simple word for you is that we are privileged to have  a God who is ever-ready to embrace our worries .’Come unto me all you who labour and are heavy-laden’, He says and ‘I will give you rest’. Not everything is worth capturing your heart. You have someone who is willing to take it from you and substitute it with something better. I love the way the Message puts it :  “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Throw it off at His feet and let go off the tension..Soar above  the negative feeling .Don’t stick on: ‘I’ll get over it with time’ .As long as you are able,do with your today what you’re intending to do tomorrow  because tomorrow is never guaranteed.Dont be remembered for living a sad life. Choose to be joyful! God is able to make all grace abound towards you. He’s able to make you stand if you’ve fallen, able to guard what you have entrusted to him and ready to come to your aid where you are tempted.

God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, His Spirit deeply and gently within us. (Eph 3:20  )

Let us not  handcuff God with our lack of joy; He makes His abode  where there is fullness of joy. Take control! When you have power over that lack of joy, you won’t be afraid of what life throws at you. Reach out for the things before you .You can’t grab a hold of the new until you let go off the old. What a person plants, he will harvest. Your future holds the harvest of your seeds. Plant seeds of joy.(Gal 6:7).

©Aminata .A.R.Dibassey

‘Sorrow makes us all children again,destroy all differences of intellect.The wisest knows nothing’

‘Happiness is a perfume which you cannot pour on someone without getting some on yourself’  Ralph Waldo Emerson.


*One chases a 1,000 but 2 puts 10,000 to flight. A thousand will flee at the threat of one; at the threat of five all flee away. There’s power in agreement. Relationship is important, don’t be an island! (Isaiah 30:17 ‘One of them will chase a thousand of you. Five of them will make all of you flee. You will be left like a lonely flagpole on a hill or a tattered banner on a distant mountaintop’ NLT.)

*To have peace, be a peacemaker. You can’t just wish for peace. It takes a sacrificial and conscious effort to make peace. Be at peace with all men if you can! (Romans 12:18 ‘Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone’ NLT)

*Remind God of His promises, it may take years to come to pass but it works. Tested and proven! (Isaiah 1:18 ‘Come now, and let us reason together,” Says the LORD… NKJV)

*Blaming others means you are refusing responsibility for your action. It may not be your fault, but we all do have a will and power to say YES or NO. (Galatians 6:5 For we are each responsible for our own conduct.NLT)

*Truly, we all can forgive.Unforgiveness is just because we choose not to forgive and make excuses for ourselves. Colossians 3:13 ‘Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.’ (NLT)

*You’re more like the devil when u cause division for he is the accuser of brethren.U simply become an evangelist of the enemy when u carry and contribute towards his assignment.
(Proverbs 6:16-20 16 ‘There are six things the LORD hates— no, seven things he detests:17 haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that kill the innocent,18 a heart that plots evil, feet that race to do wrong 19 a false witness who pours out lies, a person who sows discord in a family.’)

*You are more like God when you make peace and share love. He came to give peace not as the world gives. (Psalm 34:14 ‘Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace and work to maintain it.’NLT)

*The worst  form of deception is self-deception. Never deny there is a problem but never make the problem your focus, it blurs vision. Trust God and He will make a way. (Galatians 5:19 ‘When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear………..’NLT)

© 2010 Aminata .A .Dibassey